Da Feasts of da Beast of Revelation 13

Hint: these dudes ain't no Longhorn fans!!!

The funeral for EVEL KNIEVEL will be held at the Butte Civic Center in the late daredevil's hometown of Butte, Mont., on Monday, with Crystal Cathedral founder Rev. ROBERT SCHULLER officiating, The Associated Press reports. A large number of mourners are expected to gather at the Civic Center, which can hold about 10,000 people.


But Jesus said unto him: Follow me; and let the dead bury their dead. Matthew 8:22

I beheld, the same horn made war with the saints... And he shall speak great words agianst the most High...and think to change times and laws: Daniel 7

The Feasts of the Beast of Revelation

An examination of the Fruits of Post Modern Ecumenical Evangelical Religious Charasmania

"Enter ye in at the straight gate: for wide is the gate, and broad is the way, that leadeth to destruction, and many there be which go in there at." Matthew 7:13

A real irony exists in todays Post modern User Friendly Christian Church. While claiming to love and follow the true Messiah, the Lion of the tribe of Judah. Many of them still prefer to celebrate their own man made religious holidays, rather than celebrate the real Feasts of The LORD as revealed by YHVH in Leviticus 23. who clearly informed us who have eyes to see and ears to hear: EVEN THESE ARE MY FEASTS.

While claiming to live their lives according to the Bible, todays Sheeple still prefer to be followers of the traditions of man and todays Evangelical Mega-Celebrities, rather than obey the living WORD of Elohim. Preferring the precepts of their chosen Religious leaders who bind them with their man-made rules and regulations, who claim that Jesus came to put away "the bondage of the law" of Moses. Instead of believing the very Word of our true Messiah!

" FOR HAD YE BELIEVED MOSES, YE WOULD HAVE BELIEVED ME: FOR HE WROTE OF ME. BUT IF YE BELIEVE NOT HIS WRITINGS, HOW SHALL YE BELIEVE MY WORDS?" John 5:46

"I AND MY FATHER ARE ONE" John 10:30

"THIS PEOPLE DRAWETH NIGH UNTO ME WITH
THEIR MOUTH, AND HONORETH ME WITH THEIR
LIPS, BUT THEIR HEART IS FAR FROM ME. BUT IN
VAIN DO THEY WORSHIP ME, TEACHING FOR
DOCTRINES THE COMMANDMENTS OF MEN."
MATTHEW 15:8-9

"THINK NOT THAT I AM COME TO DESTROY THE LAW OR THE PROPHETS..." Matthew 5:17

" IF YE LOVE ME, KEEP MY COMMANDMENTS. "John 14:15

Da Feasts of da Beast (of Revelation)

A Torah lesson by Daniyel

"Woe be to the shepherds of Yisrael, that feed themselves instead of their flocks." Ezekiel 34:2

UnLeviticus 23 NIV (Non Inspired Version)
1 And Ba’al spoke unto hi$ Profit Bunny Hinn saying, you need a new $8 million dollar house in California to park your Rolls Royce at.

2 Preach unto the children of Babylon, whose mother is in Rome; and say unto them, concerning the feasts of Ba’al, which ye shall proclaim to be haole days of obligation, not even these are real feasts. (haole= Native Hawaiian term for mainlanders, ie: "Go home Haole!")

3 Six days shall work be done: but the first day is the Venerable Day of the Sun. Twice ye shall gather together in neat rows, listening to a paid professional orator. Thou shalt pay your 10% Religion Tax cheerfully based on the only Old Testament Law your Pastor observes. Thou shalt not read Deuteronomy 14 to understand the context of the tithe, but rather obey his interpretation of Malichi 3.Ye shall observe the Law of Constantine, for Sunday is the tradition of Nicolaitan man.

4 These are not even the feasts of Yahweh, which ye shall ignore because ye are clueless of his times and seasons.

5 And on the fourteenth day of the first month at not even is Ba’al’s Underpass, which ye shall not Passover because you follow a pagan calendar based upon the worship of the Sun god.

6 And on the fifteenth day of whatever month you choose is the feast of deep-dish pizza unto Ba’al: Six Days ye must eat leavened pizza, topped with roasted pepperoni swine flesh.

7 In the first day ye shall have a haole convocation, ye shall eat as ye please, yet ye shall drink no beer with yeast for it is the law of your denomination.

8 But ye shall offer beyond your tithe unto Ba’al six days: in the sixth day is a haole convocation: ye shall work to earn your pastor’s favor, and approval to earn a seat of honor!

9 And Ba’al spoke unto hi$ Profit Cref low Dollar saying;

10 Speak unto the daughters of Babylon, and preach unto them, when ye come into the church via television, then ye shall send a tithe of your first-bread unto a Prosperity Teacher, thus shall Ba’al bless your conscience as you build a Crystal Cathedral.

11 And he shall wave the firstbread offering in your face, as he ignores the Commandments of God and fails to teach you that Jesus was raised on the true Feast of Firstfruits. He shalt twist Paul’s words to his, and possibly your own destruction, as he
Expands his TV ministry, and trades in last years Cadillac. To be accepted by you: On the festival held on the first SUNDAY,
Following the first full moon, on or after the Vernal Equinox. Ye shall have a Carne Ba'al (Carnival) Flesh Feast of self-righteous indulgence, and say your doing it to Gods glory!
Take no heed that on this ancient pagan festival on this Venerable Day of the Sun many caught venereal diseases, as Venus the goddess of fertility was worshipped, as Pagan priests raptured Vestal virgins. Thou shalt observe the spring fertility carnival dressed in your most vivid festive attire. Before Feasting on Roasted Ham swine's flesh ye shall hide brightly eggs, and decorate the coasts of your dwellings, and Churches with cute fuzzy bunny rabbits to show your obedience to your Lord, another Jesus! and ye shall teach your children to learn the way of the heathen
As they hunt for Ishtar eggs. Thou shalt not learn from King Solomon’s errors in I Kings 11 and worship the goddess Ashteroth/ Astarte under the name of Easter. Thou shalt ignore the truth of this abomination, and never question why the Greek Orthodox die their Ishtar eggs blood red, and no die is not misspelled as that is what happened to the infants conceived by the virgins on the previous years Ishtar high mass. As the three-month old children were sacrificed. Ye need not bother with reading Pauls words, unless ye are sitting under the authority of a Pastor who is accredited by a Seminary to twist Pauls writings to the satisfaction of denominational authorities!

("Your glorying is not good. Know ye not that a little leaven leaveneth the whole lump? 7. Purge out therefore the old leaven, that ye may be a new lump, as ye are unleavened. For even Christ our passover is sacrificed for us: 8. Therefore let us keep the feast, not with old leaven, neither with the leaven of malice and wickedness; but with the unleavened bread of sincerity and truth. 9. I wrote unto you in an epistle not to company with fornicators:) 1 Cor 5:6-9

12 And ye shall tarnish the truth of the true Lamb of God,
("But now is Christ risen from the dead, and become the
firstfruits of them which slept." )I Corinthians 15:20
Thou shalt continue Satan’s plan of combining Scriptural Christianity with pagan sun-god worship, which Constantine perfected
as ye compromise to be accepted by the world.

13 And at the time of the ancient Roman Saturnalia, four days
After the Winter Solstice, On the Birthday of Mithra the Roman Sun god, Ra the Egyptian Sun god, and Tammuz the reincarnation of Nimrod
The Babylonian Sun god of Ezekiel 8 infamy, ye shall ignore Jeremiah’s message in Chapter 10: Learn… the way of the heathen, and pay Astrologers to interpret signs of heaven for
Even Nancy Reagan did thus so: Observe the vain customs of the people and pay someone to cutteth a evergreen tree out of the forest with an ax. Ye are to deck it with shiny silver, and gold balls. Buy it from someone who has already fastened it with nails and with hammers, that it move not. Ye shalt worship on Tammuz’ birthday at a church which has a tree just like yours only grandeur, set in its lobby, or on its high alter. Ye shalt go deeper into debt as you use a "Smart Card" to buy your family one hours pleasure as you bow down to the god of prosperity, because surely God will pour out his blessing upon you for allowing your Pastor and his wife to take off on a luxury "Bible Study Cruise" which you should attend by using your "Smart Card." For after allah you should do your part for if enough members of your church’s global wide TV ministry accompany your Pastor’s cruise then he will get his Stateroom for free! Oh Bless your heart for expanding the Kingdom of your denomination!

14 And ye shall eat anything your belly lusteth after and ignore the statutes of the Old Testament God in allah your dispensations for ever throughout your generations in allah Pastor Bunny Hinn’s dwelling places.

15 And ye shalt ignore the Feast of Shavuot, unless your Pastor reads from Acts 2. Far better is it for you to watch CNN then read your Bible and count the War’s cost at the Pentegon, than to study how the Messiah fulfilled the Feast of Pentecost, by filling them with his Set Apart Spirit!

16 Then ye shall totally blowoff the Fall Feasts as your church keeps the only festival that brings in really big numbers in October, as ye worship your god with a Hallelujah night Halloween Carnival. To invite more people into your fellowships Sanctuary to have photographers record images of your neighborhood youth donned in all manner of fallen angels costumes upon your man-made altars using the Cross as a decorative background!

17 And ye shall keep the feast of Turkey Day in all of your dwelling places. Thank God you have no need for a Day of Atonement. After all you are an American you have no need of National Redemption when you possess the world’s most potent military, while the world’s bankers own our mythical
"Federal Reserve System" based upon a fiat money system worth only the paper it is printed on whenever the global bankers decide to pop the bubble on our prosperity pipe dream.
Never fear our fearless Prosperity false Profits teach us. First we shall all prosper before we are raptured next Sunday. We just simply need more faith in our earthly shepherds who feed themselves instead of their flocks. Whoever reads Ezekiel 34 anyway? Surely not a church full of actors!

18 And Ba’al spoke thru Robert Shoe Lure $aying, also on each Sunday ye shall have the feast of the Crystal Cathedral Tabernacle Choir, ye shall have a feast of TV Ecumenism every seven days. We need not observe the Set Times of the God of Israel, for we are the glorious Church that has replaced Israel! All you need to attend our User Friendly Virtual Cathedral is to be comfortably seated in your Lazy Boy, along with your credit card and cell phone to dial toll free after you have watched my awe inspiring message to get really good deals on statues of Jesus for only $99.00 shipping included! And don't forget to donate to our Ministry, and God will bless you a thousand times over for planting your seed in good spoil!
Allah you need is a remote to turn up the volume to hear such pearls of wisdom as:

"When I had a dream of this cathedral, I didn’t want to build it(with whose money?) without the blessing of the Holy Father. So I made a trip to Rome and I met with the Pope…I took a picture of the cathedral and I told him I was building this and that I wanted to receive his prayers of blessing. A photograph of course, was taken of us (In bed together see REV 17) and I have it hanging on my 12th floor… Then on the 30th anniversary of my ministry here I received the most beautiful full-colored photograph of the Holy Father bestowing his apostolic blessing upon my holy ministry, with a wonderful personal handwritten message… (Later I received a message on the side of the Cathedral in Paleo Hebrew it was something like Many Men knee tickle U-Far Sin!!!")